On a visit to the United States, Charles de Gaulle was honoured at a banquet in the White House. Seated beside his wife was an official who spoke no French, but who tried to engage her in conversation by asking

"Madame de Gaulle, what do you think the most important thing in life is?"

"A penis", she replied.

Overhearing this , her husband said gently "I believe, my dear, that in English it is pronounced 'appiness."                                                                  

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Donkey Willy

Billy  the English man, Billee the Irish man, and Bill Lee  the Chinese man all were climbing a mountain. Each had a donkey

. Billee the Irish man came up with an idea. He said, "Whosever donkey pees the least by the time we reach the top will  gets each of our donkeys."

Everyone seemed confident, so they all proceeded.

At the top, they asked each other how many pisses their donkeys did.

 Billee the Irishman's did 23 pisses,Billy the English man's did 12,

and Bill Lee  the Chinese man's did 0. Everyone was shocked. Billee the Irishman asked, "How did you do that?" Bill Lee's answer was

"Me name Bill Lee,  me no silly me tie knot on donkey's willy!"